Fifty Shades of Grey – this Fall!

You know what’s depressing? A grey, cloudy, frosty November, rife with rain and snow and sleet!

But you know what’s even more depressing? Reading a title that says ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’, only to find out, a few lines later, that the post is actually about the weather, that’s what!

Sorry folks. Despite the potential juiciness of the title, our post today is indeed a rant about the very literal grey weather which is exactly what I’m gazing at through the window right now, as I’m writing these lines.

Yes, winter came too early this year.

No. Correction.

According to the calendar, it’s still very much Autumn, but in reality, it’s totally winter up here. So far, we’ve been digging our cars out of the snow after the early (yet heavy) snowstorms, tried our best not to trip on the icy sidewalks, and have been driving around while our summer tires are still on (but the roads are already covered with 10 inches of snow). Ah, what fun!

September and October were not so bad this year. Come to think of it, they were quite spectacular, what with all those trees turning color. The days were getting shorter and shorter as the cold air was creeping in from the North, but hey, those red leaves were awesome!

December will be much better too. First off, there’s Christmas, and Christmas is always exciting. Secondly, there’s the winter solstice, which means that daytime will be getting longer (Ha! Let there be light!), and thirdly, there’s Christmas. So there.

But I’m digressing. I promised to talk about fifty shades of grey and we’re already half a page into this post without me touching on even one single greyness. So here we go:

For starters, there are the low-hanging clouds. Then there are the high, floaty clouds (admittedly, in a lighter shade of grey); then there’s the smoke coming out of the neighbors’ chimneys, the smoke coming out of exhausts (ultra-visible in the crisp air), the bare trees having lost all their colorful October charm, the anti-skid gravel on the roads (more blackish than grey), and last but not least, the evergreen woods in the distance (which, I concede, are technically dark green, but still). So, yeah.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I have nothing against this color. It makes for a very elegant outfit and is really lovely on pets, but the grim, frigid grey outside my window now is, well… meh. Too meh-lancholy for my taste.

Oh, June, how I miss you!

By Didi Gorman